I feel so 80s.

It’s time for a dense post. I will talk about my hair. Haha!

I am really sensitive when it comes to my hair.

One time, I was drunk, I cried to my gay friend and told him that I have a sad childhood because my mother did not style and comb my hair the way other mothers do for their daughters. Hahaha! I know! Okay, that of course I cannot explain, how can I? I don’t even remember saying it!

You cannot touch my hair if we are not friends or family or s.o., I’m telling you, I morph.

Mine has always been long, straight, very black hair, I like it I Love It! But recently, I have just decided to cut it short (shoulder length) and… have it curled. Definitely, outside of my comfort zone. So outside, it’s like me saying I love president Gloria. Haha!

I have to muster all strength to look into the mirror. I feel so 80s! not that that’s a bad thing since I have always loved the classics, but then again, me looking like one, sometimes leaves me out of words.

My hair looks like this.

or sometimes, at its worst, I look like this.

No offense to M.J. fans, but I am girl and, yes, when I can associate my looks to a boy. Gees! It’s scary!

A lot of people have been asking me nonstop, Why the hell Da?

Hmm…
Because I love doing the uncertain. It’s the thing that stops the hell out of me to stop asking and to just jump in. Of course, there are some things that I wish to take back, but hey at least, now I know! The creepy limping is done with.

At least, ngayon alam ko na, I will not do this again! My ultimatum for everyone: NO PHOTOGRAPHS FOR THIS PHASE IN MY LIFE. hahaha!

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Don’t you think life is too boring without it? (Uncertainties, I mean, NOT the curls! Silly.)

Time to Crawl

Coming to a block is the hardest part of life.

I went out of town to get this over with, only to find myself in the same spot. Dreadful, disgusting, and frustrating. Very very frustrating. I have resorted to all sorts of inspiration.. conversations, vids, internet, music, nature, zen, capoeira, running, deep breathing… A LOT OF DEEP BREATHING!!! nao, nothing seems to work.

I’ve read a whole lot during this drought. Just finished my third book plus two double digest archie’s… been blog-hopping/hogging and yes, I’m still here, dehyde to the nth!

Take this away… PLEASE!

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So, I dreamt about my ex. We were sitting beach-side, holding hands. And then suddenly it’s Jesus holding my hand. Whatever you’re thinking, I know… I myself don’t know how to react to this. After months, am I still hung up??? What?! (hehe)

Jesus in the picture. Now that’s refreshing. He’s telling me to slow down. Maybe I should?

I was telling myself and everyone how i am never bored for doing a lot of things and now I am so bored I can count the dust hovering around me! No I will not shop! No I will not overeat! I will deep breathe again… and crawl…

Crawl and crawl until this goes away.

Ouch! my knees!

I run like a kid.

So people have been asking me, why I run.  I’m pretty darn skinny (or sexy daw, haha!) , plus it’s a pretty exhausting ordeal, WHY DO I HAVE TO RUN?

Well, here is the deal,  if I start yapping about why I run, we’ll be running a one-day read for you for that one, so, I’ll just try to make it simple by saying I love feeling like a kid.

As a child, I have always been tagged as crazy (makulit), always running (kiti-kiti), crybaby (iyakin), and let me tell you I  still am in their own respects and I’m planning of staying the same.

During family reunions, it is almost always the topic that I am one hella of a crybaby. Yes, all of them, and I mean all of them, can attest to that (yeah, sometimes it gets to my nerves, hehe) and they even mimic how I exactly did it back then, but I realized as I grow older, this haven’t changed a bit.  Now, I may look fierce, but I cry at the smallest things.  Don’t get me wrong I am not trying to imply this as negative, on the contrary, i am rather proud of it. When I am moved, firing, and in so much passion, I cry, and when I do,  it makes me appreciate the things around me more and more and more, everytime…

When I run, I am FREE. When I was a kid, when I run I don’t care… bumps, bruises, scratches, whatever,  i run,  i don’t care. I cry a bit then laugh a whole lot! As we grow old, we start building up  inhibitions and this as almost always sucks the life out of us. We start caring too much about the what ifs until everything is too late. As long as I don’t hurt anybody, and I am towards a better goal, I just go. When I run, I just GO.

I love going back to feeling like a child because I love to enjoy life. I love crying because I enjoy laughing a lot. I love running because I always want to GO with anything I want to do in life. When I have fun and I’m active, I commune better with God, with myself, and with other people.

So now let me ask you, why are you NOT running?

do the things that make you feel giddy, alive, and feel like a kid, no matter how absurd it is for other people. Just go for it.