Posts Tagged ‘yapping’
No storm today!
Posted on: October 4, 2009
- In: art | die-hard-pilipina | music lover
- 1 Comment
I have been ultra melodramatic lately. I can’t help it. I do not know any Filipino (or even non-Filipino) who was not affected by storms that just hit our country. I have never been this empathic… and this thankful, that I am still here with my family.
For days a lot of us have moped, skip that now. I’m just happy we are all standing up and trying to help in one way or another. If I would be given a chance to choose to be pinoy again or not, I would without hesitation, be pinoy over and over again. I love my country. super lang. 🙂
Though what happened crushed souls, it makes you want to grab anything from life more!
I know it’s a bit early to start wrapping up my year, but so far, I am happy. Though it may look little to some people, this year I felt I’ve grown and experienced a lot. Discovered myself in becoming more fulfilled and now a lot more knowing of my passions in life.
I’ve read more. Played more. Painted a lot more. Sang and danced more. Met amazing new people. And just everyday getting fired up and inspired to live a full, happy life.
Me and my sister have made our bucket lists already, very LOOONG, so here’s just my own very-immediate-for-the-next-coming-months-sorta-bucket-list:
1. diver’s licence – I can now be officially called “master of intro dive”, hehe. I wonder how I have come to a lot of dives and never got myself a decent license. erm.
2. read more books – and articles.. and blogs… I know, sounds geeky, but when asked if you were in an island and asked to bring three things, one would be a great read.
3. violin – must study violin! cant let my violin rot like that, would be a big shame.
4. pottery – my friend introduced me to this and i am very very interested.
5. film animation – my main waterloo in art is cartoon making/animation, I am planning to learn more about this.
6. bonsai – i heard my friend saying taking care of a bonsai can be challenging. I love nature, very domesticated, but you know what they say, if all things fail to design and prove art, move to plants. Haha! Madaya to be frank because nature is an art on its own.
7. Hug more and kiss more – When language is a barrier, a kiss can settle everything bleak. 🙂
Sheesh! So many things to do! Exciting!
Great day today! OOH sun! Time to get started! 🙂
I was an addict.
Posted on: September 17, 2009
I am about to make one of those shameless conclusions:
If you are addicted to something, OF COURSE, you are selfish.
Well, I am not talking about JUST addiction to smoking or drinking (of course those are default premises attached to addiction), but I am talking about addiction in most broad aspects of…everything! Addiction to food, money, family, friends, relationships, religion, prayer, fitness, music, art, whatever! I am putting this without exception, if you have any, whether it is for good or bad, heavenly or hell-ish, addiction is addiction. Selfish. Period.
I am selfish.
Boo!
For the past few days, I suffered overstretched hamstring. My god, who knew there is such a thing?! I overdid a lot of training, convincing myself that I was doing the right thing, that pain is part of everything, blah, blah, blah… of course I was rationalizing, I have most fun when I run and do capoeira. It’s when I feel most alive, I was addicted. Hence, the classic overdoing.
I know a lot of people who smoke, and I ask them why. Most of the time find myself wincing after the “wala lang” phrase from them. Hey, not that I am excusing myself from anything. I had my fair share. I smoked, but there’s this one person who asked me why (the only person who dared), and as soon as I found myself out of answer, I dropped everything. I just dropped smoking realizing it’s the most preposterous thing I have ever tried.
When you’re addicted to something you don’t care much about anything that may hinder it, you just do it over and over again in a pulse no hesitations. Hence, my conclusion for selfishness.
Shameless conclusion number two: When you can do everything in moderation, for sure you will succeed in life (and in anything else you want to succeed in).
We are slapped in the face with a lot of balance-driven practices and concepts, like so the chi, but I just realized my lack of care of it. For sure if we find balance in work and play, activity and rest, creating and destroying (hehe!)… everything did in proper moderation, we will be living a life so in bliss.
I was an addict. I overdid. These are just MY shameless conclusions, I don’t think they can be so agreeable.
Nevertheless, today, I will rest.
I just refuse to be selfish again.
As you can see I’ve been blogging for three days straight now. And don’t you get ideas that I’m not busy or that I don’t have anything better to do. It’s just that sometimes I feel the need to tear myself away from this:
Don’t get me wrong, I love drawing but I feel that this is becoming a rigid routine, I’m starting to get ‘the itch’. I need another project, hence: blogging. Â
Okay, so while I was working on my “second floor plan; scale 1=1:50” I recalled the conversation I had with my sister yesterday. She said, my other sister was hurt because I haven’t been sharing some parts of my personal life.
Let me just straighten my back here, swing a few neck bones and shake my hands. Hooh! Stress! @@#!##%^)()($$%$&
I am often regarded as someone who is mysterious and/or secretive. As far back as I can imagine I have always been a topic among people’s conversations. It’s like I need to constantly remind them of this: I AM NOT A PORN STAR! (hehe!) But no, seriously, this has always been the case. I really don’t get why people need to know who I’m going out with, what I’m doing with my life or who I’m wasting my time with. (breathe in, breathe out) This really ticks me off.Â
Point no. 1: I am not THAT secretive (or maybe at some point I am). But here’s the thing, when I am not being asked (especially about personal stuff) I don’t go around announcing to people everything in my luggage. I am just like that, how can I ever explain!
Point no. 2: Privacy is important to me mainly because it creates exclusivity between two people. If you don’t agree, I don’t care, this is my deal.
Point no. 3: More to point no. 2; In every relationship, I believe there will always be struggles, misunderstandings and inevitable ambiguities with each other. And these are further aggravated by people who can’t stop yapping about their own experiences, irrationalities and unsupported assumptions. If differences were confronted with other people involved it is more likely to be doomed. Instead of just the two of them working everything out, instead of just the two of them conversing, because of other people’s pricking words the two of them just can’t do it anymore. Hence, another messed up relationship.
Point no. 4: I do not intentionally try to hurt people, especially friends and family. If you feel hurt because you feel I’m locking you out of my life, then I say that you’re being dense for even thinking about that.
Point no. 5: I am different. I am not a shrieking girl (and I don’t have a problem with that either). This is just me.
I think it is in my discretion what things I want to treasure for myself and what things I want to share. Don’t worry, I can always be asked, though I can’t always answer.Â
I hate explaining myself, I usually suck in it. Hehe! Did I get my point across? 😆
Again: I am NOT a PORN STAR. hehehe! 😆
DadaDoll 
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